Hope Comes to Visit

When Life Gives You Permission to Change - A Conversation with Dr. Durga Larkin

• Danielle Elliott Smith • Season 2 • Episode 19

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For decades, Dr. Durga Larkin's identity was deeply connected to her work as a cataract surgeon.

Then one unexpected fall changed everything.

After fracturing her dominant arm and facing the possibility that she might never return to surgery, Dr. Durga found herself confronting a question many of us eventually face:

Who are we when the role we've built our life around begins to change?

In this thoughtful and deeply human conversation, we talk about aging, identity, purpose, perfectionism, burnout, rest, and what it means to create a vision for the future—even when life doesn't unfold according to plan.

Dr. Durga shares the inspiration behind her book, Timeless Vision, the lessons she learned from patients who continued to live vibrant, meaningful lives well into their 80s, 90s, and beyond, and how her own unexpected injury became an invitation to reimagine what came next.

We also explore:
• Why so many women struggle with aging and identity
• The labels we carry throughout our lives
• How purpose impacts our health and well-being
• Why rest is often harder than we realize
• The connection between meaning, longevity, and fulfillment
• Learning to release perfectionism
• Creating a vision for your next chapter

One of my favorite moments came when Dr. Durga shared that her injury ultimately gave her permission to do what she had been feeling deep inside all along.

If you've ever found yourself standing at a crossroads, navigating change, or wondering what comes next, I think you'll find a lot of wisdom in this conversation.

Connect with Dr. Durga on her website - durgalarkinmd.com

And find her book - Timeless Vision

If Hope Comes to Visit has become a bright spot in your week, I'd be so grateful if you'd subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who might need it.

Your story matters. And so does theirs.

Chapter Markers

00:00 Introduction
 01:32 Meet Dr. Durga Larkin
 01:54 Why She Wrote Timeless Vision
05:46 Why We Fear Aging
09:43 The Power of Having a Vision for Your Life
12:10 Blind Spots, Labels & Identity
14:29 The Injury That Changed Everything
18:04 When Life Makes You Walk the Talk
19:17 Purpose, Meaning & Longevity
20:46 Why Rest Matters More Than We Think
24:44 Learning to Sit Still
26:15 Reinvention After a Career Change
29:18 Craving Peace
30:00 Perfectionism & High Achievement
31:25 Advice for Anyone Facing Change
33:54 Meditation, Reflection & Self-Awareness
36:21 Dr. Durga's Timeless Vision
38:12 How Dr. Durga Defines Hope
39:17 Where to Find Dr. Durga & Her Book
40:16 Final Thoughts

I’m so grateful you spent this time with us today.

If Hope Comes to Visit has become a bright spot in your week, I’d love for you to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, or wherever you listen so you never miss an episode.

And if this conversation resonated with you, sharing it with a friend, leaving a review, or simply telling someone about the show helps more than you know.

Until next time, take good care of yourself. And remember—your story matters.

New episodes drop every Monday, so you can begin your week with a little light and a lot of hope.

For more stories, reflections, and ways to connect, visit www.DanielleElliottSmith.com or follow along on Instagram @daniellesmithtv and @HopeComestoVisit



Opening Thoughts And Sponsor

Dr. Durga Larkin

Yes, I feel like the univer I really feel uh you know, I feel like the universe said, okay, it's time for you to step away. We're gonna be shifting things.

Danielle Elliott Smith

Let's take a quick moment to thank the people that support and sponsor the podcast. When life takes an unexpected turn, you deserve someone who will stand beside you. St. Louis attorney Chris Duly offers experienced one-on-one legal defense. Call 314-384-4000 or 314-DUI Help. Or you can visit Dulilawfirm.com. That's D-U-L-L-E Law Firm.com for a free consultation.

Welcome To Hope Comes To Visit

Danielle Elliott Smith

Every life has moments that change us, things that crack us wide open and invite us to come back to ourselves or even find something new. Here on Hope Comes to Visit, we make space for those stories. The messy middles, the unexpected turns, the resilience, and the healing, and of course the hope that we hope finds us along the way. I'm Danielle Elliott Smith, and I am so glad you're here for this episode. Today on Hope Comes to Visit, I'm joined by Dr. Durga Larkin, a board certified ophthalmologist, speaker, and author of the new book, Timeless Vision, who graduated from the University of Pennsylvania and earned her medical degree from Duke University before spending decades as a highly respected cataract surgeon. For years, the operating room was more than simply where she worked. It was purpose, identity, structure, and mastery. But after an unexpected injury fractured her dominant arm, Dr. Durga found herself stepping away from the role that had defined so much of her life and facing a much deeper question in the process. Who are we when the role we've built our identity around begins to change? What followed was not simply physical recovery, but an honest and deeply human reckoning around reinvention about what it means to reimagine ourselves when life no longer looks the way we expected it to. This conversation is thoughtful, reflective, and one I think will resonate with anyone navigating change, transition, or the complicated process of becoming someone new. Dr. Durga, thank you so much for being here with me. I'm so grateful to have you.

Dr. Durga Larkin

Thank you for having me. I really appreciate that. And I'm looking forward to having a conversation with you.

Danielle Elliott Smith

Yeah, this is a good

Why She Wrote Timeless Vision

Danielle Elliott Smith

one. I, you know, let's start with your book. Okay. Um, your book is called Timeless Vision. Yes. So, what inspired you to start writing? Going from being a cataract surgeon to writing? I mean, those are two that's right brain and left brain.

Dr. Durga Larkin

It is very much right brain and left brain. And actually, the ideas that I had that come out in the book have been percolating in my brain for a number of years before I ever even thought of writing a book. And the book was actually written before I had my accident. So I had already been thinking these thoughts of how do we age? How can we view aging in a way that can be empowered and feel good about the future and not being afraid of the future? How uh I noticed that through my years as an eye surgeon, I saw patients of all ages, but particularly the ages of 50 and older, and I saw many people go through transitions in their lives. And I noticed that some people were still able to have fulfilling lives and being vibrant at 80, 90, even 100. And then other people might even have similar backgrounds or similar events happen in their lives and not age well and have a lot of difficulty adjusting after an event or a loss or a setback. So I noticed that these differences were very profound. And I started really thinking deeply about why was that?

Danielle Elliott Smith

So was it curiosity for you in terms of how do I go down one path and not the other? Or was it curiosity in terms of why is that? Like what is the magic sauce?

Dr. Durga Larkin

It really was a combination of those. It was what is the magic sauce and how do I make sure I'm going down the good path? Okay. And so, and I had um a number, uh, I developed some friendships of people who were in their 80s and 90s, and I started to really pay attention to how are they having such great fulfilling lives at 80 and 90? And it wasn't that they hadn't had difficult events in their lives, they had, and yet they were still able to uh get past that. So um what a couple of things I realized in backing up was that we are aging every day. From the moment we're born, we're aging. And when we're first born uh till about toddlerhood, we're very excited about the world. We're just experiencing the world and we're not judging in any way, we're just absorbing. And then we start going to preschool and kindergarten, and from that point on to around 20, we're very excited about getting older, actually. We can't wait to be an adult and get out there into the world and do all the exciting things that adults get to do. And then around in our early 20s, we say, okay, let's slow this down a bit. I like where I am. I don't know that I want to actually go out and adult and have all the adult responsibilities. And then around 30 or so is my have two daughters, and they're uh both right around 30, and so are their uh part significant others. And I realize that is when people start to feel they want to start slowing down, put the brakes on our aging process. And so if we think that we could live till 80, 90, 100, but even conservatively 80, 30 to 80 is 50 years of trying to resist aging. And we think about things that uh, and even at 30, we start thinking about the future in terms of aging being lost, diminishment. It's a time when people say, Oh, my back aches a little bit because I moved the wrong way, or I stayed up too late at night and now I'm exhausted the following day. So you uh it's already starting at an early time where we're making that concept of like, okay, it's potentially a downhill slope from here. Then if you take on top of it events that happen in our lives as human beings, such as loss of a loved one, a job loss or a transition or retirement or medical diagnosis, um that throws us off our path even more. So, how do we how do we live um you know an empowered, beautiful life despite the things that happen to us as human beings through our through our journey?

Danielle Elliott Smith

What did

Why Some People Age Well

Danielle Elliott Smith

you find? What did you find in doing research and having these friends who are older and because to me, aging comes in in so many different categories, right? I look at just the the physical aging of our skin. I I mentioned to you but when we were off air, my daughter graduated from Olmus this weekend. Um when I tell you that there are so many young, young, young girls getting Botox and like so many fillers, like so. That is there's there's an anti-aging, I don't want to look old, right?

Dr. Durga Larkin

And then there is not a 30, but in the 20s, right?

Danielle Elliott Smith

That's what I mean. Very young 20s, right? I'm down at a college campus and many, many young girls are are getting Botox and and do whatever you want, right? So, but I'm noticing it's happening much younger. The first time I used Botox, I was 38. So um, and and that's when I decided I needed it. And I have no problem with anyone who decides they want to, but I to me that is one element of I don't want to look older. And then there is the element of I don't want to feel older, the it's harder to get out of bed, am I moving enough? And then there is the aging in terms of mental health, right? Like knowing people, getting out, socializing. So when you start to dive into this, which avenue did you find was most or most interesting, most impactful in terms of taking care of ourselves for aging?

Dr. Durga Larkin

Well, I think that for most people, it's an obvious thing, or most of us know that we have to take good care of ourselves physically and we have to exercise and we have to eat well. So we know that. And we know sort of conceptually that we need to have a good attitude, but um, and that our spiritual and mental health are important. But what does that really mean? Uh, other uh so a lot of us say, yeah, I want to have a good attitude, but I can't because I don't feel well and I have this diagnosis and I just had a loss or have had a big change in my life. So what I noticed was the people that did have long fulfilling lives, they did have a different attitude. And it was one, it's not just about being positive, but it's about being conscious, intentional, having a vision. And that's where the title came from, Timeless Vision, is that there is not a an end point of when we have a vision for our life. That we can have a vision of our life from 20 or even younger on. And it may be a different vision over time, it may evolve, but we still can have a vision of who what we want to be, what we want to do, even in the 90s. And in fact, I just saw a patient the other day who was 100, and he was telling me how he wanted to become more involved socially, and he needed to be able to communicate more with people. Uh and I thought he has a vision of himself being more social. And I thought, wow, that is great at 100 years old. Um, so uh so having a vision and uh consciously wanting to live a fulfilling life, having intention about it, choosing positive ways to think, positive ways to behave, not just eating right and exercising, but how can it really the mind, body, spiritual self is all connected, and we really can't separate those things out. So

Intentional Living With A Clear Vision

Dr. Durga Larkin

we have to look at all those things. So, in terms of what I'm writing about, it really is the more emotional, spiritual health that I'm concentrating on because that's where a lot of people have difficulty. Um, women tend to be, and this is a generalization, but women tend to have more self-reflection and self-awareness, but they still struggle with particularly the aging concept. Men that um struggle with aging as well, but a little less outwardly so. It's sometimes it's a little more subtle. For women, it's more dramatic, it's about how they look, and your worth goes down as you get older and you get gray hair and you get wrinkles. Men, not so much, but um and we all do feel it, but what women particularly, and we've got the biological clock, menopause, um, emptiness. So there's a lot more sort of signposts, if you will, of us aging. So we have to at each step self-reflect honestly and non-judgmentally about okay, where am I right now in my life? What do I like about what's going on in my life? And are there things I would like to change in my life? And then think about okay, what are some small changes that I could make in my life so that I can feel fulfilled and kind of have the next phase of my vision of where I want to be going forward.

Danielle Elliott Smith

See, I love this because you're using so vision is almost a double entendre, just based on how you've worked and what you're saying. So when you say vision, you mean almost goals and plans and ideas. Right. You mean things that that we still want to do, whether it's read 10 books in the next year, or walk to the library, or learn to play an instrument, or see a family member, or travel, or and so it doesn't have to be a big, oh my gosh, I always wanted to be an artist.

Dr. Durga Larkin

No, not at all. And in fact, a lot of times it's it's not that. It's small changes or just it doesn't have to be a big dramatic thing. Um, and uh it's like a lot of things too. You may want to do something big and dramatic, but just making small changes is uh that's a wonderful first step. Um and the concept of vision and inner vision. I actually through my book, I have lots of there are a lot of um ophthalmology metaphors, a lot of vision metaphors. And

Blind Spots Labels And Identity

Dr. Durga Larkin

another good one to keep in mind as we're talking about sort of what does it mean to be looking toward the future is we have blind spots. And one of the things that holds us back in terms of doing what we want to do in our life and being able to see the potential going forward, or if something happens to us, an event like what how can we pivot or what can we do next is these blind spots. And what they are essentially is disempowering beliefs. So I was talking about how when kids start in school, uh they get very excited about aging and getting older and doing adult things. But the other thing that happens is they start acquiring labels. And uh the smart one, the learning-disabled one, the athletic one, the slow one, the sleepy one. So we start acquiring those labels and internalizing them at a really young age. And that persists through life. Um, it obviously can change, but it can be very difficult to remove those labels. And then as people get older, they take on other labels, our roles, and we very often tend to rigidly identify with who we are. I'm a mother uh for me, I'm a surgeon, um, I'm a you know podcast producer. So whatever it is, we tend to rigidly identify that with that. And then if something happens, uh it can be hard to see uh hard to change or to see the possibilities that could come with change. So um, and that's so my personal story comes into play there. Right. Um, so the book was all things I've observed through the years, and I know deep in my heart, I feel it's wisdom that I want to pass along. But

The Injury That Changed Everything

Dr. Durga Larkin

I did go through um my own personal event, which was um in December, I fell, I had a big fracture of my arm, was my surgical arm, and all of a sudden I couldn't work. I couldn't even be in the office. And uh I was out for a number of months, I had two surgeries, and for most people, breaking their arm or breaking their wrist, um, you know, it's very painful, but you go through the process, you heal, and then you move on, you go back to what you were doing before. But as a surgeon, it's a life-altering event. Okay, and I realized that it was it was actually it became a blessing in disguise because I had been living such an intense life, and I felt like I had to be perfect all the time. And there's a pressure that comes with that, and it wasn't until and I would never even on vacation, you still carry that because you know you're coming back to the the pressure cooker. So all of a sudden I had time to rest and reflect. Um and it was it was actually a relief. It was like, wow, this is a new, could be a new phase of my life. But the whole time I was still thinking at some point I'm going back to surgery. And then when it came time to go back to work, I still was having some issues with my dexterity, and that's important for a surgeon. So I was thinking I'll have to put that off a little longer. And then I realized I didn't want to return to surgery anymore, that I wanted to make a pivot. I didn't want to do any, I didn't want to do anything where I wouldn't be perfect. And eye surgery, you have to be perfect. So I decided to retire from cataract surgery. I'm still practicing in the office. I treat glaucoma and uh a number of other medical conditions of the eyes. Um, but now I'm focusing on spreading my message of empowerment, and I'm actually living it. I had to make a big pivot and say, what am I gonna do? That my livelihood is threatened right now, and uh my whole sense of identity and who I am. Uh you know, who am I and where am I going right now?

Danielle Elliott Smith

So the universe said, you're going to talk about this vision. How would you like to live it? Exactly. I had to live it. And uh yeah. So this entire time you are writing about having a vision and empowerment. And the universe said, Okay, you're talking it. How do you feel about walking it?

Dr. Durga Larkin

Exactly. That's exactly it. And I always talk about people who talk the talk but don't walk the walk. And here it was time for me to not only talk the talk, but to walk the walk. And but what it made me realize is that all the things I had written about and thought about and talked about really were true. I it made me feel what I was had written about even more deeply and feel even more committed to the importance of how we want to look going forward. And another aspect to that is finding meaning. So, for instance, if I'm not going to do cataract surgery anymore, and that's really meaningful to me, um, and being in the office is meaningful, of course, but it was sort of a big way to help people. I felt like I wanted to find another thing that would be very meaningful to me. And that's um, you know, talking about my book and spreading that message. But an important part of that aspect to it is that having a sense of meaning and purpose at every phase of your life is important. And it's not just a theoretical uh concept or just uh psychological, even, but it's actually physiological. And they've done studies on cancer patients who have a sense of purpose or meaning or something they've got to get back to, and uh they have better longevity and survival rates. And a great study just came back uh out from Yale, Dr. Becca Levy, um, did a longitudinal study of people getting older, and she found that when people had purpose and meaning and made intentional choices about trying to live their best lives, that they actually not only stabilized in terms of their cognitive health, their physical health, and mental health, but they actually could make improvements, which is really great. Um, so it's exciting news because not only can we sense that if we take care of ourselves, mind, body, and spirit, that we will stabilize ourselves going forward, if you will, but we can actually improve ourselves. And uh so that's that's a really important thing to keep in mind and motivating for people.

Rest Burnout And Always Being On

Danielle Elliott Smith

I want to go back to something that you said that I found so interesting because I have been guilty of it as well. And I know that many women do this. You mentioned that even when you were on vacation, you were still in that pressure cooker mindset, and that once you were injured and having surgery, you found you could really rest. I can remember being with a therapist and the therapist saying, You need rest. And I said, I'm getting ready to have surgery. I can rest after that. And she said, Do you hear yourself right now? You legitimately are talking about needing surgery in order to take time for yourself. That's how infrequently we make that time. How important is it, do you think, even in hindsight, for you, for us, for women, for everyone to recognize that taking care of ourselves and part of that vision is to prioritize ourselves, even in a small capacity, even in the midst of the chaos of raising families and having jobs, but finding a way to have some of that vision for ourselves moving forward.

Dr. Durga Larkin

It's actually really crucial for our both our physical health and our mental health. And, you know, because of the whole mind body connection, when we are building up stresses and there's no way, no outlet for it, it actually, you know, uh can tip us over into illness. It's not that it causes the illness, but it's just that it's sending off all kinds of negative signals to the rest of your body, and our body has difficulty uh dealing. Dealing with that. And so the uh it's more than just um a conceptual thing. We have to really think about. I remember being at the doctor's office just for routine appointments and thinking, ah, this is good. I have a time to relax and rest. And we should not have to have something bad happen to us or be at a doctor's office to take the opportunity to rest. The problem is the way society is now with cell phones and computers and there's web service everywhere you go, you're never you never are um uncontactable. And so there's this whole concept that you can't take time off. So when you're resting, you know that someone can get a hold of you. And our society doesn't respect taking time off or ending early, or oh, this I have ease in my job. It's sort of it promotes constant work and it uh people love to say, Oh, I'm so busy, I don't have time to do anything. And yeah.

Danielle Elliott Smith

Being being contactable, being connected in some capacity just in case at all times. There are moments when I think, how did I survive the 80s and the 90s? I went all the way through college with no cell phone. I know. I how did we find each other? How did we how did we survive when we couldn't say to somebody, I'm running late, I'm not going to be there, I I can't find it. I'm I'm like, where's the map? I sometimes wonder how did we survive and yet we did.

Dr. Durga Larkin

And so we did, yeah, yep. And granted, you know, the technology gets a double-edged sword. There are beautiful things. It's great to know you can contact your children, or if you get stuck on the road, you can make a phone call, or if you're late for a meeting, you can let them know. So obviously that's a wonderful thing, but it's that other side of it where um you really can't take a break. And then people know that, well, if you're taking a break, you must have your phone off, or uh that you really are accessible. Um, and particularly with certain types of jobs, it's sort of it's uh it's not excusable. Like you can't do that. And um so it really is important to carve out that time.

Danielle Elliott Smith

Right. I also think that it means that we don't know how to sit still. Kids don't know how to sit still. We don't know how to sit still. There are times I played this little game with myself where I'll be sitting and I'll think, I like you go to reach for your phone because it's almost like your brain is asking for something to do. Yes, it's asking to be occupied because I've trained it that way now, right? I've trained I've trained it in scrolling, I've trained it in searching, I've I've trained it in reading. And I've been working really hard lately to press pause.

Dr. Durga Larkin

I've been trying to do the same thing, actually, particularly when I'm saying waiting somewhere, um uh could be anywhere, and particularly, for instance, in an airport would be a good example. And I am really trying to not look at my phone or not go on the computer, and I find myself, you know, unconsciously reaching for it, and I'm like, okay, I'm gonna give myself time. So I'm consciously making that effort as well, but it takes a lot of effort. It does, you know, yeah.

Choosing To Step Away From Perfection

Danielle Elliott Smith

It does, it's almost a retraining. I want to ask you as well, because it seems as though, at least the way you're speaking about it, um, the transition between recognizing that maybe you weren't going to be at your very best. And cataract surgery requires you to be at your very best to where you are now, like everything sort of coincided and and pushed you towards this path, that it wasn't terribly tumultuous mentally. And yet I I wonder about that because this is who you have been for so long. What was that transition really like? What was the moment when you said because I imagine first breaking your wrist, you think, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Like I need my wrist. I need this mobility. What was the point that you thought maybe I can't, and then transitioned to maybe that's okay. Maybe I want it that way, and maybe this is an opportunity to carve out an entirely new identity. I I don't necessarily know that that would have I I certainly don't imagine it was in a 24-hour period of time, but it actually was, it was sort of interesting because at first, of course, there was like that panic of, oh, what am I gonna do?

Dr. Durga Larkin

When am I gonna operate? And then, but there was deep inside of me, pretty quickly, as soon as I got past the intense pain, that started kind of liking not to have that pressure that I had had and sort of wow, I can really rest and relax a bit. And there wasn't a single defined moment when I realized that deep, deep within my being, I, you know, I've been operating for 35 years and I was feeling sort of ready to pass the torch. And I would never have done it if it weren't for this accident. And it's kind of this accident gave me permission to do what I was feeling actually deep within my being. And it wasn't I almost and I had to have courage to do it. I, because everybody just assumed I would be back, I had patients waiting for me, I had you know schedules that everybody was on hold and they were waiting for me to come back. And it was a very big decision for me to make. Um, and I very deep, deep, deep, I kind of felt that I didn't want to go back pretty early on, but I didn't acknowledge it consciously until maybe about a month in, and I started thinking about it, and yet outwardly I didn't talk about it at all. Other than I do have a close relationship with my kids, I did discuss it with them that I had these deep feelings. But other than that, I made no indication to anybody that I was ever thinking of not returning to surgery. And um, it wasn't until pretty much right before I had to go back, like literally a week before, that I said, you know what, I'm not returning to surgery. So it it was a very big deal to do that. I I think it would have been very I am 65, so I think it would have been very different if I was in my 40s or 50s. Um so I, you know, I'm not sure, but I would say that that it probably would be the case. But um, because I did feel that feeling of I've been doing this for so long, it's okay to step away from it. But I I never would have done it, I never would have stepped away if it weren't for this injury.

Danielle Elliott Smith

It sort of sounds as though your system had been craving peace.

Dr. Durga Larkin

Yes, I feel like the universe, I really feel uh, you know, I feel like the universe said, okay, it's time for you to step away. We're gonna be shifting things. Um uh you are feeling sort of a strain, if you will, doing this. And I also always felt like I wanted to step away at a time when I was gonna be at my peak, not not have to step away from because of skill level or something declining. So, in a way, it gave me that permission to do so when I never would have given myself permission otherwise. So the universe gave me permission. So much kind of how I think about it.

Danielle Elliott Smith

How much of your pressure do you think was self-induced? You mentioned perfection earlier. I know I tend to be perfectionist, and I think that when I look back on all of this, I can't stop, I can't stop, I can't rest. That was me telling myself that I couldn't stop or couldn't rest. It I was the one required to make the change. And yeah.

Dr. Durga Larkin

Go ahead. Well, I think that is true in my life. I've I've been a perfectionist, and I was a perfectionist in it pretty much everything I do. But I also chose a field where you have to be a perfectionist. When you're doing eye surgery, you cannot not be a perfectionist. You have to be a perfectionist. So it selects for perfectionists. You can't have a type B casual eye surgeon. So I was in a career that kept that going. I couldn't step away from perfectionism if I wanted to.

Danielle Elliott Smith

Right.

Dr. Durga Larkin

And so um, it's not like I could say, well, I'm gonna do surgery, but I'm gonna be casual about it. I'm gonna have a more casual attitude. I that it just not, you're not able to do that. So I had selected for myself a career that demanded perfectionism, and also um uh so the only way to not be that way is was to step away from that. Totally.

Tools For Navigating Big Transitions

Danielle Elliott Smith

What would you recommend for someone who is potentially facing a career shift the way you are right now or the way you have?

Dr. Durga Larkin

Yeah. Well, I think that one of the very most important things to do first, and this is true with any kind of life change, a career change, but also if you've had a lot a loss in your life, if you're going to be retiring, even things like empty nest um or medical diagnosis, all these big events that happen that have uh uh you know impact on our lives going forward, you have to sit quietly and really look inward and be self-reflective in a very non-judgmental way. And again, look because and be honest with yourself about what's holding you back. Are you afraid of change? Are you afraid of what could happen? Um, do you have regrets from the past that or regret that you didn't choose a path in the path that you really would have liked to? Um, do you feel guilt about things? Um it's important to acknowledge those things, forgive yourself, and then move on and say, okay, those things happened in the past, I'm going to make some changes now. What is it that I really, really would like to do? And it's it's an easy thing to say, but difficult to do. Say, well, if you're following your passion, uh you'll have an income. And it's not always that easy, and it's not always practical. So it may be that you have ideas about shifting to another career or developing other areas of yourself, but it might be for a while that you still have to continue doing what you're doing because if you have to make a living, if you're not retired, you um, you know, there's that the practical aspect of it. And you know, there's a whole other path we could take about manifesting things that and that's not what we're gonna talk, that's not what it's about today. But um, so the idea is that how can I so say you want to be a writer, is what can I do to start being a writer? You know, uh, do I want to write a book? Do I want to write poems? And then start think giving yourself time to do that. Start with a journal. So part of it is being reflective, and good ways to do that are to meditate. And a lot of people are very intimidated by meditating. Uh, many of us have the monkey mind, and we feel like we uh can't calm our minds down. And I would say that meditation does take a little bit of discipline, but even if you can just do breathing, breathe into the count of four and out to the count of six is a favorite of mine because it's so easy to do, and you just gradually slow down your breath because how your nervous system feels also affects your emotions and your mind, uh your uh your mind-body uh uh alignment again, where you want to calm your body and that will also calm your mind. Um, I actually came, I actually uh created a meditation that I have on my website that is only five minutes. And even someone who says they can't meditate can do five minutes in it. Just think of it as a guided relaxation rather than a meditation.

Danielle Elliott Smith

That's fantastic.

Dr. Durga Larkin

That can be really helpful.

Danielle Elliott Smith

And what is the website?

Dr. Durga Larkin

Um it's durga-larkenmd.com, all one, all lowercase. Yeah, it's d-urgasmd.com. That's fantastic. Yeah.

Danielle Elliott Smith

I always recommend Insight Timer as well, which is an app, and it's meditations for free. There's guided meditations that allows you to check in and say I'm having a good day, I'm having a bad day, I need something that's that's anti-anxiety, I need something that helps me sleep, I need something that that is calming, I need, and it it gives you do you want three minutes, do you want five, do you want 25? And so I've been using Insight Timer for many years now.

Dr. Durga Larkin

There's so many options and there's so many um different types of uh I meditations available. I think that for someone starting out, the idea of just sitting quietly and you know watching your thoughts go by is very, very difficult. I think if you're just starting, it really helps to have some guidance because I still I've been meditating now for a number of years and I love it. It's like it's my go-to to calm me down, and I actually meditate in the middle of the day. I close my office door and it's like no one's allowed to disturb me. But it's sort of my reset. But I still like a guided meditation because I do have a brain that's always going, and I can have even now I have difficulty quieting that monkey mind. So having those guided meditations, when my mind starts to wander off, I can come back to what the uh person is saying.

Danielle Elliott Smith

I am very much the same. My brain is always going. What is your timeless vision for yourself? And

Defining Hope Gratitude And Next Steps

Danielle Elliott Smith

has that shifted, considering that your accident happened after the book was done?

Dr. Durga Larkin

Well, I know that it is definitely shifted. I had no intention of retiring from catch surgery when I did. I had the intention of publishing the book, and I really didn't know where it was going to go from that. Uh, you know, I thought the idea of speaking engagements and podcasts was nice, but I didn't really hadn't thought much beyond just getting it published. And so everything changed when I had my accident, and when I started thinking about the possibility that I wouldn't be, because I didn't even know at first, could I go back to surgery if I wanted to? And so I had to really start thinking about what am I going to be doing? Um, and I started thinking more and more about the timeless vision and the message. And then also I was getting a lot of feedback from people, a lot of um positive reinforcement and uh messages and notes from readers saying how much they appreciated the message and you know that they thought I should get the message out there. So it it took on a life of its own that I hadn't planned and had not predicted actually. So uh so this whole thing with my accident was a huge pivot in my life. It was a big um, it was a big turning point in my life that had was not planned.

Danielle Elliott Smith

But you have recognized it for what it's supposed to be.

Speaker

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Dr.

Danielle Elliott Smith

Durga. Dr. Durga, how do you define hope?

Dr. Durga Larkin

I define hope with never giving up, always feeling that there's good things coming. And I think that in the world right now, there's so much chaos. We all need hope. We all need to feel okay, there will, there are good times coming, and there is beauty and goodness in this world, even right now, despite all the chaos around us. And so part of that, I to help us feel that way is one, I'm hoping to inspire people to feel what I'm trying to do is be my best self so I can help other others be them their best selves. But also doing a little bit of gratitude every day, just even if you do three things that you're grateful for, to see the beautiful things that we do have in our life. And um, and it sounds trite perhaps, but it really is very valuable and it's it's quite effective to help your mindset see the positive things in your life and in this world rather than just the barrage of negative things coming at us.

Danielle Elliott Smith

I love your notion of having a vision keeping us young. Where can everyone find you in the book?

Dr. Durga Larkin

Um, well, you can find me on uh dirgalark and md.com, and you can also find me on Facebook, Instagram, and uh LinkedIn. Uh Facebook and Instagram are uh Dr. Dirgelarkin and then Instagram is Dirgalarkin MD. I mean sorry, LinkedIn is Dirgalark and MD. And then uh you can find Timeless Vision anywhere uh your books are sold. And I also did I have a Kindle version and I also recorded my own Audible version. Oh, that's fantastic. Yeah. So people have said they like it because they hear they can see me talking to them. Oh, that's perfect.

Danielle Elliott Smith

Yeah, that's a dream. I love that. Yeah, that is fantastic. I'm so grateful to you for spending time with me today.

Dr. Durga Larkin

Oh, thank you so much. It's been such a pleasure.

Danielle Elliott Smith

Likewise. Good luck with everything, including your timeless vision.

Dr. Durga Larkin

Thank you.

Closing Message And Sponsor Thanks

Danielle Elliott Smith

Friends, I am so grateful to you as well for spending time with Dr. Durga and I. And I hope that this has inspired you to start planning for seeking out and sharing the visions that you have for your life to keep aging at bay, right? So go ahead and share this episode with anyone you know who needs to hear it. Find Dr. Durga's book, Timeless Vision. And until we spend time together again next time, take very good care of you. Naturally, it's important to thank the people who support and sponsor the podcast. This episode is supported by Chris Dulley, a trusted criminal defense attorney and friend of mine here in St. Louis, who believes in second chances and solid representation. Whether you're facing a DWI, felony, or traffic issue, Chris handles your case personally with clarity, compassion, and over 15 years of experience. When things feel uncertain, it helps to have someone steady in your corner. Call 314 384 4000 or 314 DUI Help, or you can visit Dulilawfirm.com to schedule your free consultation.